


Derek's Inner Wolf Guide To Self Actualization And Eventual Happiness

by beekayem



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek Has A Spiritual Journey, M/M, Mates, Post Season 2, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-16
Updated: 2013-05-16
Packaged: 2017-12-12 02:13:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/805953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beekayem/pseuds/beekayem
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"How long is this stuff going to tak-" Alan Deaton watched as Derek slumped backward onto the shiny metal bench with a loud thud.</p><p>"Not long at all." he answered before turning and going about his usual business. Just because he had an Alpha werewolf passed out and drugged up on his operating table didn't mean he couldn't get ahead on his finances.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Derek's Inner Wolf Guide To Self Actualization And Eventual Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> Unbeta'd. Nothing really terrible about this fic as far as I can tell either so it should be okay :)
> 
> There is possibility that I might continue this in a series, but that will only happen if it happens and things tend to happen suddenly and without warning so...myeeeh. There really is no knowing where this might end up.

"How long is this stuff going to tak-" Alan Deaton watched as Derek slumped backward onto the shiny metal bench with a loud thud.

"Not long at all." he answered before turning and going about his usual business. Just because he had an Alpha werewolf passed out and drugged up on his operating table didn't mean he couldn't get ahead on his finances.

Derek on the other hand was wading through a metric shit ton of angsty grayscale memories in a swirling vortex of gloom and doom. It was the sort of thing he'd have never decided to do had Peter not finally convinced him that to be the best Alpha he could, he needed to find inner peace and wisdom. He was still mildly regretting his decision (having his body unattended -he knew Deaton wasn't sticking around, the bastard- and vulnerable was not what he thought of as a 'good time' Peter thanks very much) until he spied the hulking shadow ahead of him.

Briefly there was a sharp pang of overwhelming joy when he saw the wolf standing there watching him. It was black and beautiful with glowing red eyes and for one terrible moment Derek thought it was Laura. When the realisation hit him that it was _him_ and not her though, he could feel the newest scar on his heart tear itself open once more.

The wolf whimpered slightly as the wave of guilt and grief rolled through Derek, and stepped toward him slowly. Reaching out he allowed his fingers to shift through the creature's fur and scritched lightly at the scruff of its neck, "So I guess you're me then." he murmured more to himself than to the wolf. The wolf huffed at him and lifted its muzzle to nose at his jaw gently. Derek let the tension bleed out of his body at the soft snuffling, "You're supposed to be guiding me right now..." he paused before pushing his face into the fur and adding, "And to be honest I could really use the help."

Because as much as he moaned and scowled and scoffed about Peter's suggestion – Derek didn't really want to be as big a failure as an Alpha as he already was. If this was a chance to finally become the kind of Alpha Laura would be proud of, he was going to do it no matter how stupid it sounded.

The world around him flickered in and out, ever growing and changing. Flashes of familiar faces sitting around a large backyard. Then flames and ash and pain like no other. There are images of buildings of apartments and people from another life when he still had someone.

Derek found himself struggling to keep a hold of his concentration with the entirety of his life wibbling and warping. Out of the corner of his eye every now and then a mouthful of razor sharp fangs would snap and snarl at him, his hackles rising before he realised that it wasn't real. Through it all the wolf remained, ever present and sturdy as it whuffed at him and licked at his palms.

Time moved differently in there. It felt both like he'd been there for mere minutes and also years. He could feel his mind tire and strain while his body buzzed and crackled with energy. All at once he knew everything and nothing and for the first time in his life Derek Hale felt _whole_.

Moreso than even when his family were still alive.

So rather than being a shock and feeling what probably would have been mild disgust and horror at the final image that flared up and seared itself into his eyelids – Derek felt the breath he'd been holding since finding Laura out at the sight of the bright amber eyes he'd grown to recognise. Relief flooded his veins as he pressed his nose into the fur of the wolf once more and muttered a soft 'thank you' before it was ripped away.

As his eyes flew open and his body flung itself upright so he was sitting, Derek sucked in air like a drowning man.

Deaton was leaning against the doorframe watching him carefully, "Did you find what you were looking for?" he was curious despite his expression and tone carefully constructed to say otherwise. At Derek's nod the vet shifted into the room properly and crossed his arms over his chest, "Do you understand now? What I meant?" another nod. Deaton arched an eyebrow at the younger man, "Will you tell me what you saw?"

There was a split second of hesitation as Derek debated over whether he would or wouldn't before he nodded once more and met Deaton's gaze with his own, "Stiles." he said, "I saw Stiles."

Turning away from his patient Deaton went to leave the room, pausing briefly to say, "I thought you might." and disappearing into the rest of the clinic.


End file.
